Dan Daiquiri

I just can’t seem to keep away, or shake the idea of never really writing the same form of narrative that I’d always wrote. It’s quite a thing of beauty that once you see the higher plain and detach from all of your old identities, you then become free. Free of all the pain in your life, all of the lies previously fed to you from the depths of your own consciousness.

My issue always was that I believed my own bullshit, that I was too scared of relieving myself from the overarching story I told myself over and over again. I am no longer the same form I once was: all of the gripes, the habits, the destruction and the victim mentality is all but a distant memory. The fact is I’d become a byproduct of other’s perceptions, and the truth is many of us float through life constantly aiming to meet the expectations of others. I chose to break free and to be, well me- whatever that looks like. Although this was only a few months ago I was infact this other identity- the shadow me, who for some reason claimed he was infact the real me for so long. I can’t for the life of me remember quite exactly who he was- only his actions. Actions of which the consequences have now passed onto myself, in which I must take full responsibility for to live the life I truly want.

It’s all in the mindset, if you can infact see that everything you do is only controllable by you. You soon realise that all in all, who you are can be changed very quickly. We spend our lives blaming our past, blaming others and blaming our current problems on external factors rather than realise that all there ever is, is this moment. The past does not exist, not in any real sense- sure things have happened before but that is not any sort of excuse to be “the way you are” and to refuse to see another perspective. Blaming others is another form of passing the buck and refusing change, although other’s actions are indeed out with our control- how we react and respond is not. So, if we ourselves feel a certain way from another’s actions- it’s our mind that has reacted and as such can be changed. In every waking moment we are a blank slate, we can shape and mold ourselves into whatever we want- and once this is realised, life suddenly feels lighter and no longer a burden.

If I can change my entire identity, from one state to the next. Then I truly believe that anybody can, traveling from a stubborn mind with no desire to change to an open mind, free of toil and free of mental burden. What the fuck happened? How the fuck did I do it?

There is so much flying around in my mind right now, and finding the articulation is quite challenging. I’m in a very good place, but the next phase is a full blown planning phase to the rest of my life. No longer ruled by false narratives and limiting beliefs. I want to fully learn how to put this on paper and project it, to aid others in their life journeys.