Dan Daiquiri

Back again, after another hiatus, I’m getting good at this

Do you ever get lost in your own thoughts and sometimes ponder how you came to be where you are now? Sometimes the mind gets ensnared by wondering what if. Not wishing for things to be different, because that insinuates that I am not in fact happy. Quite the contrary, but it’s just one of the many loops of the human mind.  I do sometimes wonder however, the what ifs of my life yet also the near misses. Those times where you take a moment to reframe and refocus, to speculate and illuminate the journey so far. The coming and passing of so many faces and personalities really shines a light on how transient this life really is.

There is however on the flip side, situations which bloom into fruition from what feels like randomised patterns and thoughts. These are the moments that make life worth it, through all the tough points, the down times, the ones where you feel like there is no point in carrying on. When you are done in, to the point you almost give up- although you know deep down, you never will. When this is what you feel, something great is just around the corner. The pendulum of life swings again.

Often, we are blindsided by what feels like a dark world, a place where everybody is out for one another. Constant panic that everything will crumble down, always feeling like the life is not fair through the constant comparison we subject ourselves to. And this inner dialogue we have controls our perception on life and frames our now. There’s life out there, there’s humanity, kindness, and everything we all feel so lacking. It is all there; we just don’t want to see it and force ourselves to look the other way because that’s who we are as humans.

Consciousness is bizarre, especially the way in which our own perception and reality of the world is in fact a multifaceted collection of smoke and mirrors. Each person with their own combination of these different mirrors and stories all interweaved and entangled to produce your current moment in this reality. However, when you strip this all away, we just are- in this moment, and nothing can ever take that away. This life and everything in it, is truly a marvel and something which I ponder constantly.

At this juncture in time, I am very happy, I am also aware of the work needed to be done on myself after months of neglect. However, by writing these thoughts and venting bits out there, I know this will go a long way. For some reason, writing consistently is tough these days, so I want to commit to trying to update more frequently.